NOOMA Rhythm | 011
You aren't a genie, You aren't the white bearded wizard behind the curtain pulling the parking lot lever or the shopping sale lever. You are so much more than that.
As I'm going through and reading my journal from December of 2008 I constantly cringe at my past thoughts and actions. It's embarrassing to see my perspective of who You are and what your followers should look like.
Life is more than marriage. Love is more than eros.
Both Jimmy and her are married to other people now but how selfish of me?
And to consider my view of who God is and how God works is so biased. To think because I wormed my way back into her life and caused her to break up with him that God was "with me" and "for us" it makes me cringe and embarrassed for who I was.
And yet I wouldn't change a thing.
Who we were always leads to who we are.
That was four years ago so my journey with You was four years younger. As I continue to seek and search for Your heart my own is transformed as I attempt to live in rhythm with You.
The past cannot be changed. Did David blot out the parts of the bible where he sinned? The parts he isn't proud of and embarrassed about? No, our walks with God are rough and full of stumbles, scraps, scars, but it's beautiful. It's beautiful to see God take brokenness aside and make it beautiful. The point of the bible and even the point of my past isn't about how we sheep are great followers, but rather how the Shepard is a magnificent leader.
I have such a terrible memory so a lot of this stuff I've long forgotten. But I do remember my view of what a Christian should be as these entries have refreshed my memory. I use to view a christian as this suffering self sacrificial solemn soul. If I was joyous or finding pleasure in creation then I was being selfish and sinful. It's sad to think that not only did I use to see Christianity like that but that many still do. But I have faith in You. I believe that if You can change my perspective of Christianity then You can change the rest of my brothers and sisters as well.
Life is a song. It's been playing since the beginning of the world. Now it's our time to play our verse. Will it be in tune and be an beautiful addition to the song? Or will it be flat, out of place, unoriginal?
You are not a genie or a wizard. You are the Father.
You aren't a genie, You aren't the white bearded wizard behind the curtain pulling the parking lot lever or the shopping sale lever. You are so much more than that.
As I'm going through and reading my journal from December of 2008 I constantly cringe at my past thoughts and actions. It's embarrassing to see my perspective of who You are and what your followers should look like.
Life is more than marriage. Love is more than eros.
Both Jimmy and her are married to other people now but how selfish of me?
And to consider my view of who God is and how God works is so biased. To think because I wormed my way back into her life and caused her to break up with him that God was "with me" and "for us" it makes me cringe and embarrassed for who I was.
And yet I wouldn't change a thing.
Who we were always leads to who we are.
That was four years ago so my journey with You was four years younger. As I continue to seek and search for Your heart my own is transformed as I attempt to live in rhythm with You.
The past cannot be changed. Did David blot out the parts of the bible where he sinned? The parts he isn't proud of and embarrassed about? No, our walks with God are rough and full of stumbles, scraps, scars, but it's beautiful. It's beautiful to see God take brokenness aside and make it beautiful. The point of the bible and even the point of my past isn't about how we sheep are great followers, but rather how the Shepard is a magnificent leader.
I have such a terrible memory so a lot of this stuff I've long forgotten. But I do remember my view of what a Christian should be as these entries have refreshed my memory. I use to view a christian as this suffering self sacrificial solemn soul. If I was joyous or finding pleasure in creation then I was being selfish and sinful. It's sad to think that not only did I use to see Christianity like that but that many still do. But I have faith in You. I believe that if You can change my perspective of Christianity then You can change the rest of my brothers and sisters as well.
Life is a song. It's been playing since the beginning of the world. Now it's our time to play our verse. Will it be in tune and be an beautiful addition to the song? Or will it be flat, out of place, unoriginal?
You are not a genie or a wizard. You are the Father.