"Aslan," said Lucy, "you're bigger."
"That is because you are older, little one," answered he.
"Not because you are?"
"I am not. But every year you grow, you will find me bigger."
-Prince Caspian Chapter 10
God You are big,
You are good
The more and more I grow with You each year the more and more I begin to uncover how big You are.
What am I suppose to do? I always feel so lost, and I never seem to hear Your voice about things I would really like to have answered.
I've heard Christians say God answers prayers in three ways:
Yes
No
Wait
Is that true? In the bible I see You answering prayers in all kinds of ways. Maybe that's just American Christianity.
If that is the case then I seem to be getting all the Nos and Waits.
Maybe my sin is too great, that You won't or can't speak to me?
That never seemed to stop You when You loved the hookers and the tax collectors.
Maybe I have my answer I just don't see it because I don't like it.
Maybe You don't care what I do. Maybe no matter what it'll be great.
Even so, I'd like some confirming support from my Abba.
I don't want to wait forever when You don't care what I choose.
I don't want to act when You had something better if only I waited.
God I know You are big, You see the big picture, You see all time, You are big.
And I know You are good, You want good for me, You know how to give good gifts.
So what do You want me to do? Should I wait, or should I carry on?
If You want me to wait, how long will it be?
If You want me to carry on, What's the next step?
I need more grace to wash my sin, and I need more Spirit to guide my steps.
I hear these stories about other Christians praying and asking for confirmation and pastors randomly walking up to them and completely confirming their prayers. But how many times have I deceived myself with false confirmation? Or how many times have people spoke into my life only to have the door shut?
How do I know when something is from You and when it is from man?
Maybe we'll never know for sure? Maybe everything is from You? You certainly are big enough. If everything is from You then I ask for wisdom to understand how to interpret everything no through my own lens but how You planned it.
Am I over thinking this? Did Abraham ever ask questions like this? Did the first Adam question his call, or purpose?
Maybe the true sign of a relationship with You is complete contempt.
If that's the case I'm not doing a good job. I worry about this sort of thing often.
As I grow weary and impatient, You grow bigger and bigger in my perspective.
What the heck am I suppose to do? Wait, or carry on?
"That is because you are older, little one," answered he.
"Not because you are?"
"I am not. But every year you grow, you will find me bigger."
-Prince Caspian Chapter 10
God You are big,
You are good
The more and more I grow with You each year the more and more I begin to uncover how big You are.
What am I suppose to do? I always feel so lost, and I never seem to hear Your voice about things I would really like to have answered.
I've heard Christians say God answers prayers in three ways:
Yes
No
Wait
Is that true? In the bible I see You answering prayers in all kinds of ways. Maybe that's just American Christianity.
If that is the case then I seem to be getting all the Nos and Waits.
Maybe my sin is too great, that You won't or can't speak to me?
That never seemed to stop You when You loved the hookers and the tax collectors.
Maybe I have my answer I just don't see it because I don't like it.
Maybe You don't care what I do. Maybe no matter what it'll be great.
Even so, I'd like some confirming support from my Abba.
I don't want to wait forever when You don't care what I choose.
I don't want to act when You had something better if only I waited.
God I know You are big, You see the big picture, You see all time, You are big.
And I know You are good, You want good for me, You know how to give good gifts.
So what do You want me to do? Should I wait, or should I carry on?
If You want me to wait, how long will it be?
If You want me to carry on, What's the next step?
I need more grace to wash my sin, and I need more Spirit to guide my steps.
I hear these stories about other Christians praying and asking for confirmation and pastors randomly walking up to them and completely confirming their prayers. But how many times have I deceived myself with false confirmation? Or how many times have people spoke into my life only to have the door shut?
How do I know when something is from You and when it is from man?
Maybe we'll never know for sure? Maybe everything is from You? You certainly are big enough. If everything is from You then I ask for wisdom to understand how to interpret everything no through my own lens but how You planned it.
Am I over thinking this? Did Abraham ever ask questions like this? Did the first Adam question his call, or purpose?
Maybe the true sign of a relationship with You is complete contempt.
If that's the case I'm not doing a good job. I worry about this sort of thing often.
As I grow weary and impatient, You grow bigger and bigger in my perspective.
What the heck am I suppose to do? Wait, or carry on?