'Well,' said Staines, frowning slightly, 'that's very difficult to say—which to value higher. Honesty or loyalty. From a certain point of view one might say that honesty is a kind of loyalty—loyalty to the truth…though one would hardly call loyalty a kind of honesty! I suppose that when it came down to it—if I had to choose between being dishonest but loyal, or being disloyal but honest—I'd rather stand by my men, or by my country, or by my family, than by truth. So I suppose I'd say loyalty…I myself. But in others…in the case of others, I feel quite differently. I'd much prefer an honest friend to a friend who was merely loyal to me; and I'd much rather be loyal to an honest friend than to a sycophant. Let's say that my answer is conditional; in myself, I value loyalty; on others, honesty.
-Eleanor Catton, The Luminaries
I'd never given much thought to the two, honesty or loyalty. I suppose I'm thankful the two are not mutually exclusive. At least not all the time...
I think the two mixed nicely together makes for something very perfect. To honestly want to be loyal to someone or an idea a belief.
I completely agree with the character Staines in this section of the book. I value loyalty in myself and I think anyone who knows me at all would say the same. And I completely value honesty in others for just has the character states what good is mere loyalty? Someone beside you strictly founded on duty what a disgusting thought, like paying someone to be your friend...
I miss Bea, this space is difficult. I miss her thoughts, I miss her eyes, I miss our little talks. I went to Mikey's bible study Thursday night...it was difficult to get through, I had so many thoughts and I wondered what Bea would say about them.
I value loyalty in myself but honesty in others, yes this space is difficult for me but it is honest for her. It's strange how our choices impact others. Her request for space consequently becomes my space too. No matter if I want it or not it is the nature of a relationship where two people's lives are connected that if one wants distance the other by default also gets distance.
I do deserve to be desired, to be missed, and to be chosen. It is what is required for love to exist.
Like I was saying a couple weeks ago, The critic who loves every thing that is passed across their desk is no longer a critic they are no more useful than if no one was at that desk. It is our yes and equally our no that help shape the boarders of ourselves from the rest.
Love is in the choosing in the selecting that is what shapes the boarders of ourselves.
I do trust that Bea can make the right choice for herself. Not her friends, not her counselor, not me, she alone and I suppose as much as I hate it, space lends itself a sort of clarity and opportunity to see what there is by removing it.
Just as the critic who loves everything loves nothing, so the person who has not gone without something does not truly know it's value or importance in their life. Although we have gone without each other and it was this very same space of the past 8 months that has given me the clarity of her priority in my life, I suppose she would like the same opportunity.
I hope this time apart offers her the clarity, the honesty, and the answers she's looking for. I hope this isn't just some ritual she must religiously follow because friends and counselors told her she should.
No matter, I am a man of my word and she asked for a month. I can and I will honor that.
But that doesn't stop me from missing her in my life like crazy. So many thoughts, topics, conversations I'd love to have with her.
God, I pray that Bea finds her honesty and I pray that she finds peace in that.
Thank You for the time I've had her in my life and I ask for much much more time.
I miss her and I love her very much so, oh God.
Please once more, oh God.
-Eleanor Catton, The Luminaries
I'd never given much thought to the two, honesty or loyalty. I suppose I'm thankful the two are not mutually exclusive. At least not all the time...
I think the two mixed nicely together makes for something very perfect. To honestly want to be loyal to someone or an idea a belief.
I completely agree with the character Staines in this section of the book. I value loyalty in myself and I think anyone who knows me at all would say the same. And I completely value honesty in others for just has the character states what good is mere loyalty? Someone beside you strictly founded on duty what a disgusting thought, like paying someone to be your friend...
I miss Bea, this space is difficult. I miss her thoughts, I miss her eyes, I miss our little talks. I went to Mikey's bible study Thursday night...it was difficult to get through, I had so many thoughts and I wondered what Bea would say about them.
I value loyalty in myself but honesty in others, yes this space is difficult for me but it is honest for her. It's strange how our choices impact others. Her request for space consequently becomes my space too. No matter if I want it or not it is the nature of a relationship where two people's lives are connected that if one wants distance the other by default also gets distance.
I do deserve to be desired, to be missed, and to be chosen. It is what is required for love to exist.
Like I was saying a couple weeks ago, The critic who loves every thing that is passed across their desk is no longer a critic they are no more useful than if no one was at that desk. It is our yes and equally our no that help shape the boarders of ourselves from the rest.
Love is in the choosing in the selecting that is what shapes the boarders of ourselves.
I do trust that Bea can make the right choice for herself. Not her friends, not her counselor, not me, she alone and I suppose as much as I hate it, space lends itself a sort of clarity and opportunity to see what there is by removing it.
Just as the critic who loves everything loves nothing, so the person who has not gone without something does not truly know it's value or importance in their life. Although we have gone without each other and it was this very same space of the past 8 months that has given me the clarity of her priority in my life, I suppose she would like the same opportunity.
I hope this time apart offers her the clarity, the honesty, and the answers she's looking for. I hope this isn't just some ritual she must religiously follow because friends and counselors told her she should.
No matter, I am a man of my word and she asked for a month. I can and I will honor that.
But that doesn't stop me from missing her in my life like crazy. So many thoughts, topics, conversations I'd love to have with her.
God, I pray that Bea finds her honesty and I pray that she finds peace in that.
Thank You for the time I've had her in my life and I ask for much much more time.
I miss her and I love her very much so, oh God.
Please once more, oh God.